Farmer Brown

 Over the years I have learned there are no accidents in life, there are no "mishaps" every moment is designed to bring us to the place we are for purpose. There are times that we are acutely (sometimes painfully) aware  the instant it happens other times it will be years later when we retrospectively look back at our lives that we make the connections. 
  It is the glory of God to conceal a matter, but the glory of kings is to search out a matter. Proverbs 25:1 

I frequently tell people of the many wisdoms Father Rossi shared with me. One of the most important things was to "be still and listen" yesterday I did just that. I was in an unfamiliar place and saw a bench, it was rather hot, but the breeze felt nice in the shade. I was not in a particular hurry and something in my heart just said to sit and be still for a while. So I did. I sat and watched people come and go for a while, smiled as they passed me by.

 Then I saw him.

The most charming elderly man, certainly a man that had lived in the area his entire life emerged from the building wearing brown pants and a tan shirt. It wasn't just his adorable "old man attire" that caught my attention. Attached to his very well shined up walker was a John Deer Green sign that said "Farmer Brown" in yellow letters, on the other side of the walker was similar plaque that stated "Oliver" I was being approached by "Farmer Oliver Brown" As Farmer Brown shuffled closer to the bench  I was actually overcome with the urge to go hug the stranger. Instead of raising to the lever of a total freak I smiled at him. I noticed a woman walking toward him, she was from an assisted living facility. She asked if he thought he could make it to the van. I looked up and thought "no way" she had parked across the parking lot. It was currently nearly 100 outside, the poor fellow would have a heat stroke trying to cross the parking lot. He looked up from his slightly hunched over position and shook his head. I slide over on the bench and patted the seat next to me "come have a seat" He became animated and said "Look at the audacity of this young lady" I just laughed. He winked. His helper assisted him to sit down and warned him not to bite me, to which I replied not to worry I will bite back. He chuckled. As she left to get the van he finished his drink which was from a red solo cup, the reusable ones. I don't know why I found that so amusing, but I certainly did. The country song kept running though my head as I watched him drink. As he slurped the last bit he handed it to me as though I was there to help him. Which was just fine. The he patted my leg and offered me advice. Advice that made it tough for me not to cry as I thought about his life and what the words meant to him as he shared them with me. "Always love him, that's all he wants, we can be real stubborn" "do you understand?" After he said those words he looked at me as though I was supposed to say something so as I am choking back tears I said "okay" Then he took my hand and he told me "just be there for him so he is not alone, God doesn't mean for us to be alone"  and he squeezed my hand. As I looked at this man it took every thing I had not to sob as I thought about him being alone. His van was already at the curb, his helper was waiting for him. I watched him get up, handed his helper his red solo cup; he turned around and told me "I am 92 years old, I know a thing or two" and with that he got on the van.  I watched him get on the van and through the tinted windows I saw an elderly man sit alone. I felt sadness in my heart as I watched them drive away. I imagine he had once had someone he loved greatly and now missed her as she was gone. I hated seeing him alone going back to the assisted living facility. Even in writing this it brings tears to my eyes and pain in my heart for anyone alone. In that instant there was a very personal moment I had. I did have to leave, I certainly was not going to sob on the bench in public. The reason I was compelled to sit for nearly 45 minutes on that bench for no good reason? It was for that moment to occur. I needed to be reminded that relationships matter. Over the last several months I have been with the mind set that certain things just don't matter. This was a very clear reminder that connections do matter. 

Yesterday was a day I won't soon forget. I woke up  feeling like I was at the lowest point in my life. I have always been on the other side of the coin I was flipping. The emotions I was trying to process started to pile up long before yesterday. Over the last week I have had the highest high to the lowest low. I have realized the Lord was using this to bring me back to where I need to be spiritually. As I sat yesterday at the Ada Jenkins Center I gained new perspective as I choked back tears feeling completely humbled with new perspective. Little did I know the day was going to end at the hospital on a much higher note than it began. Farmer Brown is not a man I will soon forget, just like the stranger we picked up hitchhiking about a year ago. People can come into your life briefly and make lasting impressions on your heart with few words.