Starting Summer

Just a few days left before summer vacation starts for the girls. Heather seems to have big plans for everyone, not realizing that as adults we have responsibilities. I would like nothing more than to be able to take the summer off and spend it with she, Brittany and Andrew. Truth of the matter is Andrew and I both can't do the things Heather has planned. We have to work since those money trees aren't growing.  I have yet to win more than just a couple of dollars (literally $2) with scratch off lottery tickets.So its off to work every day for us adults while Heather chills here with her new nurse; even Britt has a part time job to head off to.

Heather values family time greatly, that has become more and more evident over the last two weeks. She wants quiet family time more than she has in the past.  I have noticed over the last couple of weeks that Heather would rather spend time on the porch sitting on laps and snuggling opposed to watching movies or playing video games. I love to see the look of love, peace and joy on her face, I cherish the way she giggles and makes jokes curled up in Andrews lap during these moments. The moments that we share are simple times I capture in my heart and mind. Times I could never have imagined. These are times I would love to go back and be able to give to her older sisters. Every child needs to be loved and never to question it from either parent.

One of the many things Heather wants to do is go camping. When the girls were younger I always took them camping. Our greatest Summer memories are from camping at Lake James. Many summer nights we spent in a tent out by a fire. I loved those times with my girls.

I look back at the trips the girls and I took, the laughs we had. Those trips were our escape from the world we lived in. It was always just us girls. Our trips were filled with the laughter and love, something we craved and needed desperately. The last two years of our lives have been drastically different, getting progressively better with each passing day. We have talked about camping again; with great excitement.

When the girls and I have alone time I love to listen to the things they hold quietly in their hearts about family. The desires they have. Sometimes I find it difficult to not share these moments since they are about someone else very important; but I don't want to violate their trust by sharing. There are times I want to verbally embrace someone with love and the secret desires, hopes and dreams that have been shared in the quiet moments of open reflection.  Sometimes I try to stutter out in partially poorly constructed phrases that likely make little sense, in my heart I pray that the message I am trying to convey reaches the heart and mind of the one I am speaking to, but at the end of the conversation I realize my comments were simply to vague.

We are going to have a wonderful summer, the Lord has blessed us, even through our trials He was blessing us. As I sit on the porch late at night after everyone has gone to bed I look up at the heavens, I have long contemplative conversations with the Lord in those moments. I have been given insight into many things in these moments.. I love the quiet. I love the summer and everything about it..